For immediate release · 22 October 2026

PlanWerk confirms it is unaffected by Shopify App-ocalypse after checking whether it uses PHP

Company absent from affected-app lists. Internal investigation finds it has no PHP.

Statements2 min read

MELBOURNE, VIC: Amid growing concern across the Shopify app ecosystem, PlanWerk has confirmed that it is not included in the unfolding App-ocalypse.

The company reached this conclusion after founder and CEO Sebastian Klett asked Claude Code whether PlanWerk was affected by the reported PHP exploit. Claude searched the web, listed one directory, and delivered its finding:

“Planwerk itself is not affected. I can say that with confidence, because it has no PHP in it.”

Claude Code, following one web search and one directory listing
Screenshot of Claude Code being asked if Planwerk is affected by the PHP exploit and replying that it is not affected because it has no PHP.
The investigation, in full. The directory has been listed.

Management has accepted the finding in full.

“People want reassurance at a time like this. We asked a direct question. We got a direct answer. It even looked in a directory.”

Sebastian Klett, Founder & CEO

The review took approximately seven seconds of web searching. PlanWerk has described this as a rapid incident response, though it has not established that there was an incident to respond to.

The company also confirmed that it does not appear among the affected Shopify apps. This was attributed to several factors, including its lack of PHP and the fact that PlanWerk is not a Shopify app.

“We have been spared. Some may say we were never in scope. We prefer to focus on the outcome.”

Tom Ross, Head of Gemini

An internal briefing initially proposed calling the result a clean bill of health. Legal suggested “a screenshot of a chat.” The screenshot is now being circulated as evidence that the question was asked.

PlanWerk extends its support to developers and merchants dealing with genuine disruption. It will continue to monitor the situation closely, particularly if a future exploit affects software it actually uses.

No PHP. No listing. No further questions.

ENDS

This release is satire. Executive quotes are invented. The Claude Code response is shown in the supplied screenshot; it is not a security audit or a claim about the safety of any Shopify app.